On MarioKart

All of my life I have loved racecar video games.  Sure, I loved the Super Mario Bros. games for old school Nintendo, but my cousin and I used to spend hours at a time playing Excite Bike (I think that was the name...) - the dirtbike racing game.  In arcades I could always count on the giant enclosed "car" and steering wheel to keep me occupied while I waited my turn for air hockey, even if I always sucked at shifting the gears.  So, you can imagine my delight when Little Sister bestowed the gift of MarioKart + WiiWheel upon me Christmas morning. 

I had heard nothing but good things about this game, and have been dying to play it on the WiiWheel for quite awhile now.  As we helped my mom prepare Christmas morning brunch, we eagerly planned out our day of Wii fun - Mario & Sonic Olympic Games, Mario Party 8, and the grand finale, MarioKart.  Just as soon as breakfast is finished we promised. . . .

Then it was decided Big Sister, Brother-in-Law, and Nieces should join us for brunch.  Instead of playing the Wii, the family strolled outside, nearly all of us in our pajamas and slippers, and took turns taking shots with my dad's new over/under shotgun at two Coke cans.  Naturally.  After target practice, we loaded up into my dad's truck and headed the five minutes to their house to check out the Nieces' Christmas loot.

Returning from their house, Lil Sis and I settled down in front of the big screen tv for our Wii marathon.  Just as we popped in MarioKart, Big Brother, Sister-in-Law, and Baby Nephew popped by for an impromptu Christmas visit.  Wii playing was suspended (and Masala placed in his crate) while we chit-chat and played with Baby Nephew. 

I'm not sure what happened next, it's kind of a blur of dog-walking, horse-riding, shower-taking, and movie-going; at any rate, no MarioKart was to be had on Christmas Day.

And so we move to the day after Christmas.  The day was busy with friends and lunches, but the night promised a foursome of Lil Sis, Lil Sis's Roommate, J, and I battling it out MarioKart style.  I could hardly contain my excitement. . .except, well, when it got too late and everyone fell asleep instead of getting together with a miniature wheel and banana peels. 

Now it is Saturday. My last day in Athens. MARIOKART WILL BE PLAYED, DAMMIT.  Brunch at The Grit, indie movie premier, and then, alas, *cue angels singing "Hurrah"* MarioKart! 

I have set up the Wii, put some snacks in the oven, and begun creating J's Mii when J exclaims, "What's wrong with Masala's eye?!" 

Sure enough. It's pink. It's sort of swollen. It's freakin' scary looking.  Phone calls are made and the next 3 hours are spent in the emergency room at UGA's Small Animal Hospital.  Apparently, someone does not want me to play MarioKart. 

Alas, the story does have something of a happy ending.  Thankfully, nothing seems to be seriously wrong with M's eye.  There was a small "trauma" playing tug-of-war which fortunately did not lead to any detectable "ulcers," just some minor swelling.  After receiving the good news, Indian food takeout was procured and inhaled immediately upon return home, around 8pm. 

And then. . .well, then the heavens parted and I finally got to play MarioKart.  Of course, this was not before it took half an hour to rig the television in Lil Sis's old room. Yeah. I told you, someone did not want me playing MarioKart. 

I can see why, though, because frankly, I was born to play this game.  Donkey Kong ain't got nuthin' on my Luigi and his Wild Wing cart.  Bring it on Wario, you're going down. 

If you need me, you'll find me perched on the couch, WiiWheel in hand, kickin' ass.