Back Together Again

No, I'm not talking about Eminem and Kim. Although they just got re-married like 5 minutes ago, the word on the gossip street is that Eminem filed for divorce again! I find this exceptionally hilarious, but then again I'm in law school and my sense of humor has taken a nose dive.

Whose back together is me and the gossip rags (I do not know, nor care whether this sentence is grammatically correct). Whilst keeping my butt alive in Assassins, I was forced to go to a different gym most of the time, unless I visited the gym near the law school at ungodly hours. The gym near the law school, as you might guess, is frequented by law students and I couldn't risk being seen and ratted out.

So I started going to a gym closer to the undergrad dorms, and I don't know the deal with the undergrads - maybe they steal the magazines more? - but the in-house reading selection is the pits. The other day I had my choice of: O, Vogue, or Sports Illustrated: Campus Edition. Where's the People? The US Weekly? I'll even accept the dreadful Life & Style here!! Once there was a Vanity Fair, and that was actually a very good gym-read, but I borrowed that in order to finish an article, and I suspect any other issues in later months suffered the same fate. O was ok, but kind of bleh. Vogue had too many advertisements and pictures for my taste. And I didn't go near the SI because my interest in sports has gone the way of my sense of humor since I've been in law school. Plus, reading about sports - not so much.

Yesterday I returned to my old stomping grounds, and although I had half an issue of Time to get through, I was very delighted to see the shitty gossip fodder sitting in the magazine racks for my elliptical perusal. I mean really, how else will I get the sordid details about Nick's new Laguna Beach girlfriend? Or the argument Britney and K-Fed were having in their hotel in Hawaii at 3am that was so loud the hotel staff were summoned to shut them up.

Sure, I could buy the stuff, but a) I don't have that kind of cash, b) stories change from week to week and who wants to pay for bad info, and c) (and yes, this is entirely hypocritical) I'm sort of opposed to the magazines in the first place b/c they cause all this paparazzi stalking of celebs, which is out of control, and probably make up lies, lies, lies. So while I won't support the zines with my own money, I'm more than happy to look at them on someone else's dime -
because the tv at the gym is always turned to the fucking news, and I can't imagine a more boring thing to watch while I'm suffering through 30 minutes of cardio (too short to reach the channel button).

Oh wait, I think I can - American Idol on closed captioning. (True story - one time I was at the gym pretty late and this girl, who didn't have the requisite headphones to tune into the station via the radio to hear the audio, put in on AI and didn't bother to turn up the volume. She watched that shit on closed captioning ya'll. I might have even blogged about it...)

So, yeah, it's good to be back at north grounds gym where I have a choice between reading about Iraq and global warming in Time or Lindsay Lohan and Katie Holmes in Star. And I think we all know which is more important.